Restraining order, stat!!!

There was some high quality entertainment one afternoon during my stay at Off The Wall when a pair of remoras were stalking me like they were paparazzi!  At the end of my very first dive in Belize, a small remora followed us up to the boat and tried to nibble on a fellow diver's toes, so I was already understandably wary of these unusual fish.

In case you're not familiar with them, remoras have a large flat head with a sucker disc which they use to attach themselves to sharks, turtles, boats, divers...you name it.  Basically, they're lazy bastards looking for a free ride.  They feed off the larger animal's leftovers.  I've heard conflicting accounts as to how painful it can be to remove a remora that has attached to your skin.  I was not particularly interested in finding out firsthand!

I noticed that a pair of remoras seemed to be circling me.  I tried to swim in a different direction - they followed.  I tried ignoring them - they came closer.  I tried kicking water at them with my fins.  Evidently they interpret this as aggressive behavior and want to investigate even more closely.  Needless to say, I was on the verge of a minor (underwater!!!) panic attack at this point, when my divemaster swam up behind me & grabbed the back of my tank.  He motioned that I should calm down.  I frantically pointed at the mean scary fish that were chasing me and got a nice glare in return.  Somehow he managed to convey "just ignore them" with no words, and I tried to focus on keeping my eyes forward for the rest of the dive and just breathe.  

The damn things still ended up trailing me all the way to the boat, which I was promptly teased and laughed at by every single member of our group for the rest of the day.  Even my parents joined in on the mocking - my father suggested that 'it might be the tattoos,' and my mother concurred with 'watch out, they might try to eat them off you.'  Wishful thinking, Mom - I made it to the next island in one piece!!!